Fall

Today was very autumn-y. The sky is cloudy but the sun is shining so the leaves are really bright while the sky is somewhat dark. My favorite. It's cold enough to layer but not so cold that mittens and hats are needed.

I've mentioned we live across the street from a cemetery. It's really not at all creepy and is one of the prettier spots in town. I have a good view from my kitchen and the leaves over there are especially bright. This morning I watched as the workers set up a tent for a funeral. It was a military funeral and there were men in their dress blues (is that right?) with flags and rifles. I stood in my sliding glass door and watched as they saluted with their bright, white gloves and spun the rifles around in sync. Beautiful. The hearse entered through the wrought iron gate with the procession behind it. I didn't even know who the funeral was for (it's a small town so it's not unusual to know exactly who's funeral it is) but I watched until there were too many cars to see the military men anymore.

It was a sobering moment in an otherwise normal day.

The Pumpkin Patch

A couple of my high school friends and I have a yearly tradition of visiting the pumpkin patch with our little ones. There are three of us and we all had our first two kids around the same time (I pulled ahead with Elisabeth this summer)! Here are some of my favorite shots that Betsy took:

Betsy is the Martha Stewart of my friends. She and her mom made these shirts after seeing them in Family Fun Magazine. Elisabeth got a matching bib.



Since Elisabeth couldn't stand along the fenceline she gets her own close-up:



And this year we made the husbands come, too. There is no way we could chase the kids through the maze, playground, and patch without them. However, when you bring men and they see pumpkins they inevitably go for the biggest one. And then prove how manly they are by lugging it on their shoulder. See how strong he is?

I did it.

Barely. I "ran" my 5k today and my legs are killing me. I ran a lot harder than I normally do because there were people watching (of all things). My time was so bad that I laughed out loud at the 2 mile when they called it out. Lets just say that by the time I hit the 2 mile mark my friend Brandi was crossing the finish line. Yeah.

But I wasn't last! There were 2 runners behind me and a pack of walkers behind them. And I kept my pace with the runner ahead of me the whole time so that was nice. I still despise running but actually being in the race was sort of fun. I got a t-shirt and a medal which Charlie has been wearing all day. He and Henry have no idea how badly I did...they just saw MOM! in a RACE! COOL! And I got water, fruit and a granola bar at the finish. Bonus.

Chad took the camera but he had Henry in a stroller, Elisabeth in a carrier on his chest, Charlie and our niece Caylee walking beside him. And he was trying to get to different points on the course to cheer me on. He did good! And pictures would have been truly embarrassing anyway.

So, I persevered (Charlie was cheering that from "Sumo of the Opera"), I ran the race (Hebrews 12:1) and what have I learned?

My legs hurt.

Actually, I did learn to get up, work hard, and get moving. And maybe next time I'll do even better...(wait, did I just say next time)?

Finding Time

I don't have a hobby. I'm pretty sure I never really had one but at this point in my life even if I wanted one I don't know where I'd fit it in. My hobby is keeping my life from imploding. I jealously look at others who are doing fun things or hobbyish things and think "How'd you manage that?"

I mentioned in an earlier post that I'm running in 5k. I use the term "running" very loosely. It's still a jog- more like a speed walk with a hop. I don't know what possessed me to think this was a good idea. Getting off the couch and moving after a baby takes some effort and I thought giving myself a goal would help me get back in shape. The problem is running is NOT fun. And I have to find at least an hour to change, run, and get cleaned up on top of everything else in my life. Only a few more days and I'm done. This is my new motivator- after Saturday I will NEVER run again. Unless someone is chasing me- and I'll only run if it's life or death.

What surprised me the most in my "training" was that I did find time to practice. It was necessary and I wanted to run in the race so it had to be done. My excuses for not doing certain things because there is no time don't seem to hold water anymore. I guess we make time for what we think is important. We make time for what's necessary...I wouldn't skip grocery shopping or putting gas in my car because there's no time. I don't get to make that choice. So when this race is over I'm freeing up some time...will I let it get wasted again or will I find something productive to do? Hopefully I'll figure out what's most important...and remind myself there's time.

Confession: I hate my IPOD

We've had our IPOD for a year and a half and it has 7 songs it. I love the songs we picked but really 7 isn't very many- go ahead and hit "shuffle" and you still hear the same songs over and over. I'm pretty sure I put those on in one day and have never put any other songs on it. Because I hate it.

It's not the IPOD itself that I hate. It's one of the tiny shuffle ones and it's pretty handy with it's little clip that I can stick on my clothes. Actually getting those songs onto the IPOD gives me a headache. People are always raving about how easy and user friendly apple products are. I'm beginning to think they say that just to make people like me feel stupid.

The other night I decided I would download some podcasts. There are some radio shows that come on while I'm at work and I'd love to listen to them whenever I feel like it. I went to itunes and picked out my podcasts. They downloaded into my library and I thought "Hey, this is really easy." Then I tried to get them from my library onto the actual IPOD. I didn't just try, I read the directions, I googled more directions, and TWO HOURS later I still don't have the podcasts.

Here's my idea...there should be a button that says "Load" or something simple like that. Push the button and there you go. IS there a button like that? Am I missing something? I really, really, really want to put some stuff on there. Can anyone help me?

My 100th Post

Man! I totally missed the 100th post! This is 102...in blogland I'm supposed to type 100 things about me once I reach post number 100. I promise you there are nowhere near 100 things that are even remotely interesting about me. Let's shoot for 25 shall we? (Ugh, I've read over my list and I'm warning you it's completely random. I was hoping for some form of order. Oh, well.)

1. I had a doll named "Doll-y" and one named "Doll-y Sister". I was very imaginative child.
2. I stepped on a piece of glass when I was seven and had to get stitches in my foot without some form of numbing medicine so I screamed the entire time and made my dad pass out.
3. I love run on sentences.
4. And sarcasm (which is a shame because I use it inappropriately too often).
5. Once I saw Joey Lawrence in Target while vacationing in Florida- it was disappointing.
6. President Bush drove through our town in 2004 and he waved to me- that was awesome.
7. My favorite book is "Bridge to Terabithia" and I didn't see the movie because I knew it wouldn't be as good.
8. I have a huge phobia of holes (especially when they are somewhere they shouldn't be-like a wound or something which is an entire post in and of itself).
9. I used to have my scuba diving license but now I also have a phobia of deep water. For some reason I think I might drown.
10. I never win ANYTHING except for one summer at the library I won a "guess how many gummy fish are in the jar" contest. I won the fish- gross.
11. I've destroyed all pictures of me taken in 7th grade...except for the ones my friend Heidi has (but I will find those, too!).
12. I loved summer camp so much as a kid that I went every summer until college, then worked at one until I got married, and then lived at one for four more years. It was liking being a kid until I was in my mid 20's.
13. My mom told me I was going to marry Chad before I even met him.
14. I can watch 7th Heaven reruns over and over (which makes everyone in this house crazy).
15. The smell of lavender makes me gag.
16. I can never get enough of vanilla (or coffee).
17. I love cold weather.
18. I love everything about Michigan except for humidity and mosquitoes.
19. I used to love doing laundry but with three kids it is my nemesis.
20. My mattress is so awesome that every night I tell my bed "Oh, bed, I love you." Seriously.
21. Peas are my favorite.
22. I worked at a hardware store the first year we were married and for a short period of time I knew some things my husband didn't.
23. My children are born with awesome hair. It's a good trade for the wicked heartburn I endure while I'm pregnant.
24. I had five booklights in my nightstand but the boys have stolen/hid/broken them all.
25. I'm really good at getting the string back in a sweatshirt hood or the waistband of wind pants when a kid yanks it out (lots of practice!)

Aren't you so glad I stopped at 25? That took FOREVER.

And it's fixed!

Sorry about that...didn't mean to leave you wondering for so long!

The instructions from the computer fix it guy were to take the laptop apart piece by piece. Certain pieces were then submerged (yes- SUBMERGED) in distilled water overnight. I was hyperventilating at that point because in my mind submerging computer parts in water was a bad idea. The pieces then needed to completely dry out over a couple of days and then put back together. Not only did it work but the laptop works better than it has in awhile. I think it needed a good cleaning.

Now, here's the lesson learned (and, no, it's not to keep hot drinks away from the laptop- I'm drinking hot cocoa as we speak)- what if I decided the computer guy was crazy and refused to do what he said? Logically, it didn't make sense. If I would have ignored him the laptop would be forever broken and I would be out quite a sum of money. But instead, I trusted the professional and all is well.

Isn't that just like life? How often does God want us to do things that don't logically make sense? It's something I've been pondering for a good two weeks. Something to think about.

An Awful, Horrible Thing

I may have quite possibly done the worst possible thing ever. I mean, really, the worst thing ever.

Last night after dinner, Chad was cleaning up and I was sitting at the island with his laptop looking up various things he tossed my way...random information I can't seem to remember because of the horrible thing I did. Because he is so wonderful he made us both some green tea with honey (our new obsession since he's had to medically give up coffee). It was delicious and sweet and scalding hot just the way I like it...with extra honey.

Chad took out the garbage and Charlie stood next to me to see what I was typing and reading. I have tried and tried to remember what happened next but I can't figure out what I did. All I can remember is the burning feeling in my lap and the shock of seeing my tea cup UPSIDE DOWN on Chad's laptop. His work laptop. His work laptop full of sermon notes and various other VERY IMPORTANT things.

I sat frozen, with my mouth open, staring at the laptop. Next to me, Charlie made this horrible "ooooohhhhh...." sound. Sort of half-moan, half-whisper. Then he freaked out and started saying "Where's Dad? Oh, man! Where's Dad? This is BAD, Mom. This IS BAD!"

At that moment Chad came back into the kitchen while I still hadn't moved (the laptop had gone black the instant the tea hit the keyboard) and tears where rolling down my face. Charlie yelled out "Mom spilled the hot tea!" and Chad immediately ran over and grabbed my arms.

"Did you burn yourself?"

I couldn't answer. Yes, I had burned my legs and they HURT but all I could do was lift up the laptop and watch the hot tea ran off the sides. The look of horror on Chad's face made me so nauseated I almost lost it. He turned back to me.

"Did you burn yourself?"

I nodded but still didn't speak.

"Let's clean you up." He took a dishtowel to soak up the excess then sent me to the bedroom to change. I took my time. I took a shower, found my softest pj's, and basically moved as slowly as possible, dreading what was waiting for me when I returned to the kitchen.

When I opened the bedroom door Chad and the boys were snuggling on the couch. They'd saved me a spot. I cried a lot more and couldn't do the words justice that Chad said to me. He wasn't mad. He wasn't stressed out. The laptop was broken- we'd try to fix it and if we couldn't we'd figure out what to do after that. He called "the computer guy" and followed some very specific instructions.

And then he went to the store and got us ice cream. Because he's just that great.

I've spent the evening downloading his library programs ( www.e-sword.net ), Bibles, commentaries, etc. So he can redo some of his work this week. He's a smart guy and backs up his computer regularly so most of his files were reachable.

And for the next few days we wait while the computer dries out. And I pace for whatever reason while he peaceably goes about his day. I wish I could be like that.

Injustice

For the first time ever I saw one of my children suffer an injustice at the hands of an adult. I see it kid-to-kid almost daily and though it is hard I can handle it and most of the time so can Charlie. But an adult being harsh, unkind, and unfair? That's a different story.

It started last week when Charlie told me about his school day over lunch. He got his "clip moved" which means he got in trouble (not by his teacher who is FANTASTIC but by a note to his teacher). He told me the story and it sounded unfair but I thought maybe since he's only five I wasn't getting the whole picture or I wasn't understanding it right. I shared the story with Chad and we decided if it didn't come up again we'd let it go.

This week, not only did it happen again, it happened to the extreme. It led to serious embarrassment to Charlie, a visit to the secretary, and a tearful phone call home. Needless to say I was upset. However, in my emotional pregnant state I knew better than to march into the school and unload on someone. I walked in calmly, greeted the secretary politely,m and thanked her for her discretion. I then proceeded to quietly sneak Charlie out to the van without his classmates seeing. And then I called Chad- and HE marched into the school.

First off, Charlie's school is wonderful. I love, love, love his teacher and her aide. Love the principal, love the secretary, love the librarian...but every now and then a school will have a staff member who doesn't like kids. Especially little ones. Secondly, my husband rocks. He followed the chain of command, spoke with confidence and *AHEM* made sure the offending staff member would be doing no more offending.

A couple of days later we had parent teacher conferences and can I say again how much I love Charlie's teacher? She brought up the incident (there had been a substitute teacher that day) and let us know she was behind us. It was awesome. It's so comforting when a non-relative truly knows and loves the heart of your child.

The big struggle here was deciding when to let Charlie deal with the hard stuff of life and when to stand up and defend. This isn't to say he doesn't misbehave- he does and we deal with it. There was no misbehaving involved here- only pure meanness from an adult. I had high hopes of staying under the radar during the school years. I didn't want to be the parent that made teachers groan when they saw me coming. But when an adult acts like a child and intentionally hurts the pride of one of my kids? My reputation doesn't matter much after that. Letting Charlie know we will protect him matters more.

A Busy Day

Today is Henry's second birthday! So it's 9:30 and he's still in his pj's. Actually, I'm letting him watch whatever Veggie video he wants to since Charlie isn't here to commandeer the television. Henry is in heaven.

I made a list of things to do but I've lost it. This is what happens when we go away to a conference for a couple of days. I always clean before I go so I can return to a nice house but then our things sort of explode everywhere and stay that way for an indefinite amount of time. The red longish looking thing is Henry's present that hasn't been wrapped yet. It's a tent. There's also a veggie book under the laundry basket. See, I know where things are.

Monica has announced her Spring Cleaning Contest again, thank the Lord, because I'm highly motivated to clean when there are prizes involved. Plus, my mom reads my blog and she'll die when she sees my before pictures so it will be nice for her to see the after pictures as well.

And now I'm off to clean my kitchen, bake a cake, cook some "cheeken" (Henry's favorite), and run around town getting things I forgot.

For some reason I had it in my head that I was doing a great job blogging. And then I realized I only blogged three times this month. I think I write lots of posts in my head and THINK I blogged them but I really didn't. Those were some great posts, too. I wondered why no one commented...

I finally got myself a planner for 2008. We're two months in and I'm finally ready for the new year (yeah, it's gonna be rough). I've filled it in with my work schedule, appointments, school calendar events, church calendar events...and I've still managed to double-book myself- TWICE. And I say that like I have this super active social life. I don't. I just remember in my head that Friday we are going out with so-and-so and February 29 we have a church thing- not realizing FRIDAY and FEB. 29 are the SAME DAY. If I have anymore pregnancies I will have no more brain cells left. I had a teacher in high school once say that babies suck all the vitamins out of you leaving you with mousy hair and pasty skin and this empty look in your eyes- I think she was trying to scare me into staying away from boys but I do agree I lose brain cells. But my planner is very pretty and compact and works for me! When I remember to write in it. Actually, I get really attached to my planner and can't go anywhere without it. I'm one of those people who will lose their minds if I lose my planner.

But on a much happier note I've purchased two adorable little girl dresses and I've been given the cutest little pink polka dot swimsuit. It's tiny! Having a "baby" in size 5 diapers and then pulling out the newborn stuff makes Henry look huge. Huge. I can't wait until I get the newborn diapers. I love how they look like toy diapers for a baby doll. And I can't wait to hold that wrinkly, snuggly little baby! I've got a long wait...being buried in all this snow makes July 4 seem a long ways away.

Snow Day...Again

When winter first starts and the snowstorms are quaint and exciting, we look forward to snuggling under the covers and sleeping a little later. However, after snowday #7, the staying inside with our faces mashed against the cold glass is no longer fun. We feel trapped and long to play outside. The boys have been watching "Jerry" plow the church parking lot into our backyard leaving behind massive snow hills for sledding. But with the wind chill still sitting at NEGATIVE 20 degrees "Mean Mom" won't let them play outside. We have run out of hot chocolate, we're sick of the coloring books, we've somehow lost the scissors but we don't really have anything left to cut anyway. Even the television is annoying. A new show will start and Charlie will sigh and say "I've seen this one..." and aimlessly flip through the channels. Even the library is closed due to weather. We are out of luck.

This afternoon we are going grocery shopping (once the roads are cleared a bit better) and the boys can hardly wait. We've resorted to grocery shopping for fun. It's been a long winter.

A Better Day

My mom got me some new shoes which of course doesn't fix the problem but they sure are cute! They are really a dark red and not so pink looking but my camera decided to make them look pink.

I did find out today that there will be much more pink in this house...my ultrasound today says we're having a girl! I was thrilled! And then my next thought:

What on earth will I do with a girl?

A Terrible Day

Really terrible. So terrible I really should be crying but when I'm pregnant I'd much rather cry about things that are irrational and petty. Big things, like what happened today, don't make me cry. They make me clean. I clean every corner, drawer, cupboard, and hiding place with much anger and frustration. And when I'm done I don't feel any better but I have a sparkly home to sit in so there is a little consolation in that.

Chad has been having some troubles with his health again. We decided to visit some local doctors first before making the trek to Mayo clinic. We talked to his doctor out there first and he made suggestions for what tests to request, etc. Here is what is frustrating- as soon as Chad says "I have MEN-1" you can see the new doctor's eyes light up and the two worst possible things he can say are "Fascinating!" (or "Interesting!" is popular as well) followed by "You're the first case I've seen!" Those statements are not a good sign.

Thursday we saw one set of doctors. Friday we saw a completely different set at the same hospital who had no record of the fact that we had been there the day before and they essentially asked all the same questions and ran all the same tests (our insurance company will be so happy). Today we saw another set of doctors- 2 specialists and 2 surgeons who poked and prodded and generally messed with Chad for over an hour. The diagnosis of EVERY SINGLE DOCTOR over the past week? "Here! Have some more pills! Call us in a week, or a month, or never and take these pills that make you feel worse forever!" So frustrating.

In the end Chad has an early morning appointment in Minnesota on Monday. His doctors out there are equally disappointed with the diagnosis (or lack of it) from the specialists over here. It feels good to know we have doctors who care and are ready to help.

In the meantime my house is going to "shine like the top of the Chrysler building." 100 points for anyone that can tell me what movie that's from.

I broke the law

If they arrest me my defense will be that I'm pregnant. My brain does not work effectively while I'm pregnant.

I went in to work for half a day today and left in time to pick up Charlie from school. I had a few minutes to spare so I decided to fill up the van, get some milk, and get some half and half for snow ice cream (there has to be something good about two fresh feet of snow). I filled up, went inside, purchased my stuff, and left. I made it to school with two minutes before Charlie got dismissed. While I waited I read over my receipt to see how many points I'd earned for my purchases. Next to "fuel" on my receipt it said "0." That was weird....I should have earned some points.

And then it hit me- I paid for my purchases but not my gas! I was a 'drive-off'! I'd seen the signs on the pumps that say "Drive offs will be prosecuted." Prosecuted! I can' t go to jail! I quickly picked up my cell phone and had my husband call the gas station and tell them I'd be right there.

I told Charlie we needed to go back and pay and he said, "Mom! Are the police after you?"

The police aren't after me, the attendant was very polite and understanding and even admitted he'd done that once himself.

So much for thinking I had my act together.

I'm changing my name

I think "The Sporadic Blogger" is more fitting, don't you? Without focusing on what a terrible blogger I am I will instead focus on my plethora of excuses...

1) Finally after years of hoping I am at last a work-at-home mom! We came to a crossroads over Christmas break and it was decision making time. There was a small window open where I could make the jump from 3 full days in the office to a few hours a day at home so I took it! Three weeks are under my belt and so far it's going well! Each week gets a little easier and a few more kinks are worked out. It helps that I have a sitter come over so I have solid blocks of working time (nap times are never a guarantee in this house!).

2) The snow days are killing me. I live in Michigan and I love the winter. I even love snuggling under the covers in the morning with great anticipation reading all the school closings and hoping ours is on the list. Why? I must, in those early morning hours, have visions of board games, hot cocoa, and being warm and toasty inside. Instead there are cries of boredom, cries of hair pulling (do boys normally do that???) and cries of "I want to play outside!!" (and when the wind chill is below zero the answer is a most definite no).

3) I've got a whole new routine with this WAHM thing. I have to plan ahead and make schedules and lists and menus and take out the meat to thaw, etc., etc., .... I'm a fairly lazy person (I like to say laid-back) so I tend to never plan. Ever. This month we've all had regularly scheduled doctor, eye doctor, dentist, and OB appointments. How those all fell in the same month is a testament to my non-planning lifestyle. I have a mess of New Year's resolutions to fix this problem. However, it's now January 23 and I don't have a planner yet. Just sheets of scrap paper. I'm off to a great start.

4) I've started teaching a budget class for one hour every Tuesday night (it's during the bedtime routine that night so Chad takes over and they have 'boys night'). I love it! It's at a local ministry that helps people get out of debt and get ahead. It's been great fun and my class is teaching me so much. Most importantly- EVERYONE has a story. Never assume you know someone else's life. You don't.

5) So, hopefully my resolution to actually blog will work out. I have big plans and lots to blog about. If I could just find the scrap paper where I wrote it all down...

What better way to ring in the New Year...

than with the flu? I mean, really, munching on rice chex and sipping warm ginger ale? Who can beat that?

I've had the flu before but getting the flu while pregnant is a whole different animal. It's taking forever to get my strength back. It's been 36 hours and I've finally moved from the bed out to the couch. Thankfully I got sick while we had no plans but, man, I had lots of plans for taking down the decorations and making a list of resolutions.

Now my only resolution is to eat something with flavor. Blech.

Another Trip

We are at Mayo Clinic again which, really, has become the story of our life. Chad was in the hospital over the weekend and we flew out here yesterday. In the first 4-5 hours we were here he was seen by 3 doctors and a team of surgeons. It's refreshing to know he's being checked out so extensively.

I thought I'd take pictures of the flight over here. We are thankful to be flying with Wings of Mercy because driving for 10 hours was completely out of the question.

1. My dad and the boys seeing us off. The little brown house is the airport!

2. My view from the back of the plane- it's little!

3. This is why I get a little nervous flying over Lake Michigan- the sky and the water look exactly the same.

4. I'm pretty much sitting on the wing.

5. The Mississippi River.

First Day of School

**Edited because when I checked sitemeter this morning someone found this site by a google search for something inappropriate. I changed some words and hopefully that'll fix it. Darn, that upsets me.**

Oh, the tears. And they weren't Charlie's. Last night we were laying out his clothes, packing his backpack and filling out papers for the teacher. Charlie was jumping and leaping and talking very loudly with excitement and my eyes filled with tears.

"Charlie I can't believe how big you are."

He puffed out his chest and stood on his tiptoes, "I am a BIG brother and I'm going to kindergarten!"

"Well I think I'll cry about that," I told him. And I proceeded to cry- and I mean SOB.

Here is what he said to me:

"Mom I will love you forever and ever and even when I'm gone you can look at pictures of me."

I tried to explain it wasn't that I would miss him it was that he's so big now that he won't need me anymore.

Horrified by my statement he said, "MOM! But who will be there to swat me? I need you to swat me when I'm naughty! And give me ice cream when I'm good!" Because if there's one thing I'm good for apparently it's discipline.

And here he is on his first day...

We walked to school together (it's just behind those trees in the background- I can see it after the leaves fall) and he held my hand the whole way. He opened his locker by himself, hung up his backpack, grabbed his supplies and marched into class. I asked for a good bye kiss and he said, "No, Mom. That's not cool."

So I held in my tears until I got home. I'm pretty sure a crying mother isn't cool, either.

A Sad Week

We've had a very emotional week at church. A dear lady died unexpectedly and we are all in tears most of the time. She was the one who brought the meals when someone was sick or had a new baby. She would frequently call our house and say "I made too much dinner and I'd like to bring you some tonight," and we would know she was lying and had planned on making our dinner the entire time.

She sat directly behind me in church every Sunday and I can still hear her voice and the special way she would say my name. She loved my boys and especially loved my husband. Her family from out of town knew everything about us.

I never go on visitations at the hospital with Chad because I can't take the boys. Last week the boys were especially wild and loud and BOYS so Chad said he would stay home with them if I would go sit with Lil for a little while.

I went to the hospital and we talked for almost two hours. We got so loud at one point a nurse popped her head in to shush us. Lil went home the next day and was back in the hospital just two days later. We kept thinking "Tomorrow she'll take a turn for the better." She didn't.

I miss her and it hurts to even think of her. She had vacationed a lot this summer and I can almost trick myself into thinking she's on vacation. Almost. During our chat in the hospital she told me she was done vacationing. She had traveled all over (4,000 miles!) this summer and shared the gospel with all her grandchildren, great grand children and siblings. "I'm ready to stay home now," she told me.

Welcome home, Lil.